.. ally has an excellent braking system doesn’t it? Now if you had plowed through that window, and struck something, the other safety systems would have proven their effectiveness as well. Thank goodness you didn’t though! Ha ha ha..” Larry didn’t seem to pick up on the fact that I wasn’t laughing..”On snow and ice it handles well to, the electronic traction control system was first engineered for the SC 400, blah blah blah.” I tuned him out as he entered an other babble session. “Excellent this, breakthrough that, blah blah blah.” “Great Larry. I think I like this little number.
Wonder if I could borrow it for a few days, so I can get a better feel for it?” “Well, we don’t usually do that, but you seem like an honest fella.. sure why not?” “Great! I’ll call you in a couple days, and tell you what I think.” “Okay, I can come out to your home and actually talk turkey if the trip is inconvenient for you. Here’s my card with home phone, so just give me a call anytime..” I took the card, jumped in the car and floored it. Larry’s eyes followed me out of the lot and he looked as if he really wished he hadn’t given me those keys. I started up my Aerosmith and formed a plan.
I decided to return to the dealership after closing and investigate. I realized that I had left my friend’s car at the dealership and decided that I had to retrieve it before someone noticed it. First, I swung around to my place and picked up the Impala. It felt great to be once again behind the wheel of a car the size of my apartment. I really detest sporty, fuel efficient, small Japanese luxury-sportmobiles. I picked up my buddy and drove him to the Lexus place to get his car. Having done so, I drove to Larry’s house, allowing that he was still at work.
I was in luck, no one was home. Larry lived in a nice little home in a lovely little development off Nicholasville Road. He had no alarm system and his door locks were a joke. I Rifled through his desk and noticed that he had been doing very poorly for awhile, in fact he was nearly broke before Diane’s car got destroyed. Hmm.I thought. I also noticed that Larry had received a new car as a company bonus just after selling the SC to Diane.
Hmm..I thought again.. Just then I heard the hum of and overpriced car entering the driveway and decided to make a hasty retreat through the back door. Larry smelled guilty to me, and I couldn’t help feeling as though I was about to stumble upon a conspiracy. I decided to call my fiend at the Police Station to see if they know any thing about this, or if Larry had a criminal record. “Hey Sam! No , we haven’t heard anything about a conspiracy at the Lexus dealer’s, but if you find anything, let us know okay?” Buddy replied in his usual cop manner, feeling that although P.I.’s do more work and solve more cases, they are the scum of the earth and should be watched closely. Granted, we don’t use the most ethical of evidence collection methods, but nobody’s perfect, right? “Sure thing Buddy.
How about a record on the Larry guy?” I asked, wondering if Larry was more crooked than just a simple car salesman. “Nope, he’s as clean as a sleazy car salesman ca be. Sorry Sam” Buddy replied he didn’t seem to be to upset about being unable to provide me with a lead. “Bye Buddy.” I hung up the phone, realizing once again how much I hated the police. As it was nearing dark I resolved to make a trip to the Lexus dealership to round up some conclusive evidence enabling me to solve the case and take a trip to Hawaii.
I was sure that this wouldn’t happen, but it seemed like a nice dream so I gassed up the Impala, ate dinner, and drove toward Nicholasville. I pulled around to the back door and noticed that the dealership had a very fancy alarm system. “Damn,” I muttered to myself, alarm systems can be a major hassle. I went back to the car and got my high-tech black bag of tricks from the trunk. From this I removed my multi-purpose computer interface device, a small black box enabling me to connect m note book computer to just about anything I liked, from an ATM machine to an Elephant’s tongue. (Don’t ask..) My next task was to find the nearest available alarm wire to splice into.
I was pleased to find, instead of the above, an alarm company exterior control interface box with a small lock on it. My electronic lock pick tool made short work of that, and within seconds my notebook was displaying the entire alarm configuration of the building. I sent the notebook to work on decoding the alarm security code, while I called the security company. While I was searching for the cable linking the alarm’s brain to the phone line I talked to the dispatcher, trying to divert his attention from the blips I was creating on his computer screen “Yes, we have code 4 security breach on level eight, sector 2 building 7 at client number 26342. Yeah, that’s right.
We’d also like a large cheese pizza with extra sauce. Thank you very much,” I hung up on a very confused young man, who was undoubtedly still scratching his head and looking up client number 26342. The alarm telephone cable was not difficult to locate, and within seconds it was interfaced with my notebook, and I was inside the building. I went straight for the computer system and powered it up. I hooked into the worldwide Lexus satellite network and typed in the vehicle identification number for Diane’s Lexus.
I was correct in assuming that Larry was an idiot. He had neglected the obvious and left Essie’s computer file completely intact on the Lexus-net. The full record for the ES300 appeared in front of me. It had indeed gone in for service on May 16, and had on that same day been sold back to the dealership and sent to Anchorage, Alaska. The computer also stated that Essie was still on the lot of the Lexus dealership there, awaiting sale as a Lexus-Certified Pre-Owned car.
I printed a copy of my findings, and tapped into the company’s financing software, I found that the dealership had received thirty thousand dollars for replacement of the ES300, Diane’s ES300, that they said had been run into the roof of the service department. They had then rebated this amount off of the price of a new $55,000 SC300 for Diane. The dealership made their profit, and Larry made his. The insurance company picked up most of the tab, and Diane paid the other $25,000. Larry also ended up with a nice bonus after this sale consisting of a new GS300. I printed a copy of this repot as well, stuffed the papers into my black bag and started toward the service department.
I fired up the hydraulic lift and pressed the up button. Not only did it not reach the ceiling, it was incapable of going over six feet off the ground. This was due to the fact that the lift shaft was only six feet long! I took a few photos of this phenomenon, turned off the lift and headed toward the door. As I was walking I heard someone enter. It was Larry., I heard him say,”So you’ve figured me out, huh? Well, we’ll see about that! No one tricks Larry Lundergan, no sir,” He babbled on, pretending that he knew what he was taking about. What a moron. As he babbled, he paced around the room and paced off toward the showroom. Again, what a moron.
I slipped out the door behind him, hopped into the Impala, and floored it. Just for and added flair, I once agin headed straight for the showroom glass at sixty, and once again I swerved out of the way just as Larry hit the dirt. I picked up my car phone and called a buddy of mine in Anchorage. I asked him to fax me photos of a 1994 Lexus ES300, VIN JTK38A34K4498LJE5. I told him the entire story and asked him to got the dealership and take pictures of the car, including the VIN plate. He consented and agreed to fax me the pictures, in exchange for the usual monetary reimbursement.
I returned to the office and began to type my report including copies of the insurance claim, the insurance company’s returned check, the bill of sale from the Lexus dealership in Anchorage, and the pictures of Diane’s Lexus on the Anchorage lot. As dawn broke I called the Lexus Store of Anchorage, and told them not to sell that car, as they didn’t legally own it. I faxed them a copy of my report and they consented to hold the car until further notice. I then faxed Diane a copy of the report, as well as the bill for my services. Next, I made another call to Buddy, explained the situation faxed my report and asked him to arrest Larry and all other involved parties.
He wasn’t happy about it, but he couldn’t resist a big arrest, even if it did require missing he donut break. In the end, Larry was arrested along with the general manager of the dealership for insurance and automotive title fraud. Essie was returned, safe and sound from Alaska, and Diane was allowed to keep her new SC300 as well. Diane told me that Essie was glad to be home, he hates cold weather, and that her husband Ted was happy with his new SC300. Sam Yesterday.